Not Just Theories

E19 Making Play Work (Part 4): Independent Play for Real Families - Less Guilt, More Understanding

Independent play is one of those topics that can make parents feel like they’re either winning or failing… but the truth is far more human than that. In this episode of Not Just Theories, we look at independent play through the lens most parenting advice misses: temperament.
Some children seem wired from birth to explore, tinker, or entertain themselves. Others want proximity, co-regulation, or shared attention long before they can comfortably play alone - and that’s not a parenting flaw. It’s neurobiology.
We unpack what temperament has to do with independence, how much influence parents actually have (spoiler: less than the internet suggests), and why comparing your child to someone else’s is basically comparing apples to entire planets.
You’ll also hear realistic strategies for supporting independent play without pushing it: invitations to play, connection-before-separation, reframing demands to reduce resistance, and gently increasing your child’s tolerance for short separations.
This episode is ultimately about releasing guilt, honouring individual differences, and supporting your child in a developmentally respectful way.

E18 Making Play Work (Part 3): Parent Roles in Play - Becoming the Dance Partner

In this episode, we explore the four common parent roles in play: the Performer, the Director, the Watcher, and the Dance Partner. Each role has its place - sometimes kids need a little entertainment, sometimes they need teaching, and sometimes they need space.
But the role that supports communication, connection, and deeper engagement the most? The Dance Partner. This is where play starts to feel like a back-and-forth conversation - a serve-and-return moment where your child leads and you respond, without taking over.
I break down what each role looks like, why you might naturally fall into one more than others, and how small shifts can help you move toward being a responsive, connected dance partner in play. Perfect for parents who want to support development without feeling like they need to constantly entertain or instruct.

E17 Making Play Work (Part 2): Open-Ended Play - More Imagination, Less Instruction

Not every toy needs a “right way” to be played with. In Part 2, I explore open-ended play - what it really means, how it supports problem-solving and creativity, and why it can help kids play longer and more independently.
I share examples of open-ended toys, tips for balancing them with more structured options, and how to encourage imaginative play without needing to constantly direct or entertain.

E16 Making Play Work (Part 1): Toy Rotation - Why Less Is (Actually) More

If your play space feels overwhelming or your kids ignore most of their toys, this episode is for you. In Part 1 of the Making Play Work series, I unpack the idea of toy rotation - what it is, why it works, and how it can reignite your child’s interest in play.
I share how we make toy rotation work in our home (with just a small cube shelf in the living room, not a Pinterest-perfect playroom), what I’ve learned from doing it imperfectly, and why fewer choices can mean richer, more imaginative play.

E15 Early Communication Made Simple (Part 3): Stop Asking, Start Connecting

It’s easy to fall into the habit of asking lots of questions ... “What’s that? What colour is it?” ... but too many can stall true connection.
In this final part of the Early Communication Made Simple series, I share how to reduce non-genuine questions, follow your child’s lead, and use responsive comments that spark real back-and-forth moments.
Learn what to say instead, how to tune in to your child’s play, and how these small shifts can make communication feel natural and connected.

E14 Early Communication Made Simple (Part 2): Choosing Which Words to Teach First

Not all words are equal when your child is learning to talk. In this episode, I break down how to choose which words to work on first - based on what matters most to your child and what will help them connect and communicate faster. This episode offers clear, practical guidance you can start using today at home or in therapy.
 
Pick words that are:
Useful: They let the child get what they want or need. (e.g. “more,” “help,” “open”).
Motivating: They’re tied to things the child loves. (e.g. “bubbles,” “car,” “swing”).
Powerful: They help a child take control of their world. (e.g. “stop,” “go,” “mine”).
Social: They let the child connect with others. (e.g. “bye,” “hi,” “again”).
Some helpful resources:https://www.banterspeech.com.au/helping-toddlers-with-their-first-words-mix-it-up-and-make-them-useful-the-words-not-the-toddlers/
https://www.banterspeech.com.au/late-talkers-how-i-choose-which-words-to-work-on-first/ 

E13 Early Communication Made Simple (Part 1): Serve and Return - The Foundation for Connection

Before words come connection. In this first episode of the Early Communication Made Simple series, I explore the Harvard “serve and return” framework - the science behind those simple back-and-forth moments that shape a child’s brain and communication skills. You’ll hear practical examples of how to spot your child’s “serves,” respond in ways that build trust, and make everyday moments more meaningful.
Perfect for parents of babies, toddlers, and late talkers who want to understand what really drives early communication - beyond flashcards or milestones.
Helpful Links:
https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/briefs/5-steps-for-brain-building-serve-and-return/ 
https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/videos/how-to-5-steps-for-brain-building-serve-and-return/ 
https://www.ted.com/talks/molly_wright_how_every_child_can_thrive_by_five
 

E12 Keeping the Kettle Calm (Part 3): Parental Self-Regulation - Removing the Noise Maker

Sometimes, despite your best efforts, the kettle boils over. In this final episode, I explore strategies for intense overstimulation, when yelling feels inevitable. I share scripts, mantras, and physical strategies (like yelling into a pillow, turning frustration into movement, or using loud music to “sing it out”) to help release the feelings safely. These tools let parents reset, repair, and model calmer ways of coping under pressure.I talk about proprioception and how to choose replacement behaviours that match what your body needs to regulate in the moment, based on some of what I have learnt from the Occuplaytional Therapist.

E11 Keeping the Kettle Calm (Part 2): Parental Self-Regulation - Venting the Steam

Even with prevention strategies, the kettle can still bubble. In this episode, I share ways to release steam safely when you’re close to boiling over. Whether it’s tagging in another parent, giving yourself a quiet reset (screens for the kids are allowed!), or having a bath, you’ll learn how to lower the pressure before you hit boiling point.

E10 Keeping the Kettle Calm (Part 1): Parental Self-Regulation - Turning Down the Heat

Parenting can be loud, messy, and overwhelming. In this first episode of my self-regulation mini-series for parents, I talk about preventing overstimulation before it boils over. From reducing background noise (bye-bye, noisy toys) to using loop earplugs, to simply remembering to eat, I share practical ways to “turn down the heat” and protect your own nervous system so you can show up calmer for your kids.
 
🎙️ Follow along for all three episodes in the “Keeping the Kettle Calm” series to learn practical tools to stop yourself from 'boiling over'